Because Bitch is a forbidden word*.
Longterm readers of this blog know (your
suffering time is much appreciated, thanks) of my pop-culture fixations – specifically those of the Robot Chicken kind. I’ve been searching long and hard for the perfect pattern to replicate the awesomeness that is Bitch Pudding in true life scale.
Well guess what, I asked, and La Mia Boutique provided.
Two years and countless evilbay saved searches later:
So there’s this creature in my neighbourhood that walks (read: stands around like a vegetable) her yappy little rodents off leash, lets them defecate whereever the f*ck they feel like and doesn’t clean up after them. I’ve had two (concise, precise and polite-imagine that!) discussions with her about not letting the yappy little snots do their business in our parking shed. She gave me the evil eye and went ‘no Eengleesh’. So I pointed at the pee stains and did the Vampire hands thing and the nose pinching thing.
Then it happened again. I was polite again. The creature responded, again, with the ‘NO EEngleesh!’ response. I saw the two little sh*ts (dogs) in our parking (while the creature, as usual, did nothing- well, apart from depleting the Oxygen supply in her general vicinity) so I shoo-ed the dogs off and hung around to make sure they didn’t return. So then the creature walks over to me and says ‘Are you done watchin? Huhn? Are you?’
And I replied, “So you do know English. Well that’s good. The council will be glad to know they won’t have to spend extra for a translator at your hearing. And what I do in my own parking shed in none of your business. Although what your dogs do here is.”
She looked startled then indignant then shitty (at approximately the same speed as the animated gif above) then tramped off dramatically calling to the dogs (who ignored her as usual).😄
Oh and before I forget, on a totally unrelated note:
Fabric: Embroidered cotton lawn, gift from mum, fully lined except for the back plastron (I mean to use Oona’s burnout remnant from the +1/*1 swap for the back plastron/ dickey type thing there was just enough, but it kept fraying and getting sucked into the machine so I gave up and cut a fresh one out of self-fabric).
Tights: Fiore 3D
Pattern used: La Mia Boutique 10/2010 Minidress 1/ 13.
*The handle butch pudding was coined by Carl after being told by the Diablo 3 server that Bitch pudding was not an acceptable handle (due to the presence of a forbidden word).
**Full disclaimer: I have two Lemon Meringue dolls from the 1960s and 1970s Strawberry Shortcake series one of which I plan to modify into Bitch Puddin’(the iconoclasty continues) so I can set up the two side by side in angry (read: highly entertaining) dioramas. After checking out the amount of work serious fangirls put into dollwork though, I may just have to wait till I can afford to commission someone to handle the bitchtastic conversion.
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